A message from Icasiana…
Perhaps you landed on my website because you or a loved one received a diagnosis of cancer or are suffering from trauma. Maybe you are searching for answers, whether it be treatment, counseling or other ways to cope with life altering events.
And most likely, you are afraid.
Your mind may be racing, asking a million questions at once: Why me? Why now? What did I do to deserve this? How can I beat this? Will my life ever be the same? Will there be pain? Will I survive? What will happen to my loved ones if I die? Will I be alone through all of this?
Several years ago, I felt all of those things when I discovered I had breast cancer.
The message of cancer first came to me in a dream. It was a powerful and vivid message, one that did not fade in the waking hours, as dreams normally do.
Next came confirmation of the diagnosis from the very doctor I had dreamed of. He told me I had to deal with “it” immediately and promptly plotted a treatment plan to eradicate the cancer.
I barely had time to ask questions, much less process the news.
Many people I know who have gone through this experience say the same thing. Maybe they didn’t learn about their illness from a dream like I did, but something felt off, or they felt a lump in their body and they had the wherewithal to investigate; or ignored the signs—chalking them up to a plethora of other choices: stress, diet, insomnia, etc. until it fully manifested as the “dis-ease”.
After the initial diagnosis, we go home to think about the news we have been delivered while we wait for more test results, second opinions or decide what next steps to take.
Your Google search history is littered with keywords like cures, healing and prognosis, images of tumors and treatments, as well as life expectancy and success rates. Most likely, the research is overwhelming and does not bring comfort or peace.
Oftentimes, when we come to a decision on how to approach our disease, there are constant, nagging thoughts: “Am I making the right choice? Will the disease return? Am I ever really cured?”
When I finally decided which route to take, relationships fell away because some people didn’t understand my choices, didn’t know what to say or how to be around someone with an illness.
Although I eventually understood their underlying emotion was rooted in fear, I felt alienated and alone.
